Mothercare

By Lynne TIllman, 2023

This autobiographical essay — at 150 pages — tells the story of Lynne’s experience caring her for ageing and ill mother for several years. The subhead, “On Ambivalence and Obligation” indicates that the essay will explore those feelings in relation to caring for her mother, but I didn’t find that to be the case. Instead, the essay details — quite clinically — her mother’s illness and symptoms, and the steps taken by Tillman and her sisters to care for her. The details of the illness and the burden of the care was interesting to read, but not what I expected.

While Tillman acknowledges as much, I found it difficult to parse the burden on her and her sisters with the obvious privilege they had to seek out superb medical care and round-the-clock at-home care for their mother. Apart from the cost, there is also the time, conviction and knowledge required for such care — something many people lack.

What I had hoped to read was more about why the author felt ambivalence. There were a few hints to her complicated relationship with her mother, but the essay did not explore those in detail. It is of course easy to infer how difficult this period of the author’s life would have been — it’s an incredible burden to care for an ill and elderly person nearly full-time over many years. However the author did not discuss how it personally impacted her life in any detail. Overall I found the essay quite impersonal. Two stars.